Noor Zia

During a recent encounter with a woman, her unique story shed light on the challenges faced within marriages. Her husband, disabled since childhood, evoked curiosity about how she had embraced his proposal. Her poignant response revealed the societal pressures that influenced her decision. Such encounters prompt reflection on the need for unnecessary questions and the true purpose of marriage.

Why do we burden ourselves with unnecessary inquiries? Is marriage an obligation or a Sunnah to be fulfilled once the right person is found? While acknowledging the sanctity of marriage, it is essential to consider divine intervention. Destiny determines the timing and partners in matrimony, and it is entirely possible that some individuals may never marry, just as Hazrat Maryam (RA) remained unwed by Allah’s decree.

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Unfortunately, in many cultures, parents pressure their daughters into marrying individuals already wed, driven by concerns over their daughters’ perceived expiration date. This phenomenon is particularly prevalent in countries like Afghanistan, where most girls end up in such marriages that rarely result in happiness. These girls often return to their parents’ homes indefinitely, burdened by societal judgments and stigmatization.

Forceful engagements are another distressing reality. Our neighbor’s coerced marriage to an incompatible partner led to the development of a psychological disorder and subsequent divorce merely two months into the union. These types of marriages bring forth further destruction, both physically and mentally, raising important questions about their purpose and impact.

Amidst these complexities, young girls often find themselves comparing their lives to those who are married, resulting in detrimental psychological effects such as depression, anxiety, and other disorders.

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To foster a peaceful existence, parents must prioritize their daughters’ education, nurture their self-confidence, and equip them with skills that enable them to thrive regardless of their marital status. Above all, girls should be taught to love and value themselves, preparing them for a fulfilling life even if they remain single.

Marriage is a multifaceted institution that requires careful consideration beyond societal expectations. By questioning unnecessary norms, prioritizing individual well-being, and empowering girls to define their own paths, we can navigate the complex realities of marriage and strive for greater happiness and fulfillment.

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